Friday, November 7, 2008


It was the first day of school and a new student named PedroMartinez, the son of a Mexican restaurateur, entered the fourth grade. The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American history.

Who said 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death?'" She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Pedro, who had his handup. "Patrick Henry, 1775." "

Very good!" apprised the teacher. "Now, who said, 'Government ofThe people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from theearth?'"

Again, no response except from Pedro. "Abraham Lincoln, 1863."

The teacher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed!Pedro, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than youdo!"

She heard a loud whisper: "Screw the Mexicans!"

"Who said that?" she demanded.

Pedro put his hand up. "Jim Bowie, 1836."

At that point, a student in the back said, "I'm gonna puke."

The teacher glared and asked, "All right! Now, who said that?"

Again, Pedro. "George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991."

Now furious, another student yelled, "Oh yeah? Suck this!"

Pedro jumped out of his chair waving his hand and shouting to theteacher, "Bill Clinton to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!"

Now, with almost a mob hysteria, the teacher said, "You little shit.If you say anything else, I'll kill you!"

Pedro frantically yelled at the top of his voice, "Gary Condit toChandra Levy, 2001."

The teacher fainted, and as the class gathered around her on thefloor, someone said, "Oh shit, we're in BIG trouble now!"

Pedro whispered, "Saddam Hussein, 2003."

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